It’s been a difficult day. I know deep inside of me I need to break off an unhealthy relationship but I’m not quite sure how to go about it. I really didn’t expect this….everything has been great. We see each other all the time, we get along great, she makes good food and is willing to serve me whenever I ask. Alas, it is over. Well, maybe not over, but I’m moving on. I’m tired of the well-intentioned but false sense of being together. We’re together, but strangers in the same room. I’m sure we’ll still see each other…it’s just that I’ve met someone. She is original and unique and well, she seems authentic.
We had been getting together every Tuesday morning for a few hours and then occasionally throughout the week. I just can’t do it anymore! I’m tired of being pushed around and frankly, she is so loud that it gets exhausting.
I was on my way to meet her this morning. I didn’t show up. As I drove past her, I was drawn to someone new. I walked over to meet her. Slightly nervous, but not showing it, we meet for the first time. While not perfect, our personalities seem to match up. She makes me feel welcome. She is quiet and mellow. I love her reputation in the community and she seems so supportive to those around her. I’m taking it slow. No coffee, just herbal tea. I don’t want to wreck anything. This morning we’ll just sit quietly and be patient…I’ll write more next week, let’s see how this goes…
I saw her this morning. I didn’t stop. To be honest I turned my head the other way to pretend I didn’t see her. Quickly through the green light, I ducked my car into the parking garage and briskly crossed the railroad tracks. Ahhhh, we’re together again. This time, I’m feeling courageous and inspired. Once we’re together, I discover some old friends who know her as well. They approve. I order a cappuccino. Perfection. From the dry foam rimming the edge of the mug to the hot, caramel hinted espresso roast below. It feels right.
So here goes nothing. I’m jumping in completely without abandon. Goodbye Starbucks…hello Hidden House Coffee. It feels so good to leave the corporate stiffness and join the local movement. It seems right for my money to stay here in San Juan. It is good to find a place that welcomes me and allows me to dream, pray, write and engage with those who are my neighbors.
Oh, and the banana nut bread is phenomenal.