Have you ever thought about your underlife? We all have one. Maybe you’ve thought about it, but used a different word. Whatever you call it, we all share it. The Urban Dictionary has a great definition saying, “Those emotional truths that reside beneath the respectable patina of our public lives.” I would only add they are spiritual as well as emotional truths.
My first thinking introduction was from Tilden Edwards…he writes:
It is late evening. We are alone, perhaps for the first time since we woke. Bits and pieces from the day dart in and out of our consciousness. Little desires and fears for tomorrow scatter us further. The more that rushes through our minds, the more complicated and anxious our life seems. Maybe TV will help settle us down – or the newspaper or some work – or sex – or a big snack. Less seems to gnaw at us then. Life stays put for a moment. We feel in control again – we’re “doing” something – anything.
The aftereffect of the doing leaves us less anxious, but more drugged. We’ve exchanged a gnawing anxiety for a dulled sensibility. Maybe, at least, we can sleep now. We do, on the surface. But not below. Our dreams are troubled. Fragments of life whir round and round without a center. We wake tired, and struggle for another round.
You and I share such an “underlife.” It is usually bearable; it even seems “normal,” out of sheer habit. Sometimes it is even fun. But it is not fulfilling. We are grown for more than that. When this becomes most clear, when the whole daily round feels wearisome, we hear ourselves crying out in the Psalmist’s lament:”
Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Ask God to search your heart today…so he may lead us in the way EVERLASTING!